Quiet is Violent

I stare at the tube in silence. I've been looking at it for a few minutes now and it has been the same thing – red fluids floating in the black tube, but not leaking out of it. I wished I could get closer to take a look, but the heat emanating from it is too strong. I can only observe from a distance. I have the theory that the light in there is somehow linked to the white cable on the floor and goes up to a hole in the wall. I don't know where it goes after the wall; maybe to a gigantic generator or another instrument that might give the things inside the tube life. But well, since I'm pretty sure nothing will happen, I leave the big room that is used for storing all sorts of interesting and weird things. There's something hanging from one of the white walls. I don't know what it is. I used to look at it, but it does not move. I think it is made of silver, but I can't be sure. It is actually a good thing that it does not move because, whenever I look...

Sometimes, laying on the floor in the comfort of my house, when the evening sun starts to disappear into the horizon and the night chill comes to fill the air, I wonder what else is there to be seen. I wonder what is the world like on the other side, with its different people and food and colors. I hear the Lord approaching. It is good when he comes and talks to me. I know he appreciates me and enjoys my presence, but what I really like is when he gives me permission to leave the house. It is when the adventure begin. I run through all the places that are known to me, places I used to visit all the time in the past, and I feel like I own the streets. The wind blows in my face and I feel light and free. Every night, running wildly, there is no better feeling. And there are so many things to see! Even though I go to the same places, I always find something different to appreciate and discover new things. There are mysteries behind every corner and exciting stories in...

I opened my eyes slowly. I tried to breathe and it felt like my lungs were going to collapse. Pain was all over my body and it was impossible to move. I could see I was laying in a room. It was cold, a faint light would come through an opening in the only visible window. I was right in the middle of the little room. On my right side there was a table and a wooden chair. On the far end of the room, to my left, a door. I was having difficulty remembering the last events. I didn’t know how I got there. In my head, everything was messy and there was a fog of doubt covering everything. I closed my eyes and tried to focus. I tried to remember.  I was running through the building on fire. Luna was by my side, making noises that indicated we were didn’t have much time. Everything around us was falling apart, the fire licking and taking over the whole place. Black smoke was covering my view and invading my nostrils, making it hard to breathe. A gigantic wooden door ...

My body is on fire My skin is red and wounded And everyone that tries to approach me Gets burned My mind is out of control It is screaming at me so loud Doesn’t give me a moment of peace I slash myself with a whip In an attempt to take control again In a desperate try To make the thoughts go away But the pain has no effect on my body anymore Nothing is alright Nothing is working anymore I’d do anything to stop feeling the way I do But I guess there is just tragedy in my veins Dark predictions instead of human blood I will never heal I will never be ok again It is getting harder and harder to breathe As the waves of desolation keep crashing around me Please, tie my hands right now Before they get Out of control again My hands are getting Out of control Again.

Sometimes I wonder Just how much could change in only a couple of weeks And how the hell it got to be the way it is now Do you ever think about the times we shared? Looking back on all of those nights I took for granted And all of the memories we didn't share Makes me realize that I only have myself to blame And I'm sorry that I ever made you feel this way (It is my fault you feel this way). I just wish I could make you happy one last time And I can't believe that I ever made you feel this way before (It is my fault you feel this way). I think some words can never be unspoken I guess some wounds were never meant to heal All that is left of us is a broken family and a heart that will not heal I can no longer remember how it feels to hold you in my arms The way it felt when I would have you close to me And I would know that everything was okay As long as your were here with me But you are not here with me And we've both gotten a broken heart I...

I’ve got a different story That has nothing to do what They’ve told you about her. In the end she kills herself And nobody knows why Except from her and myself In the end, she dies Because the voices wouldn’t stop screaming The ghosts wouldn’t stop coming The bad memories made the days unbearable And nightmares made the nights frightful. There is no happy ending And nobody is safe From the thoughts that storm the fragile heads Of people who think they’re in control. Nobody noticed what was happening Nobody remembered what she had gone through She was lost and lonely Afraid of collapsing again So she took some pills Believing they could make her fly They could make her like the moon Shining even in the darkest nights Nightlock! Nightlock! Nightlock! In the end she kills herself And I am the only one who knows why.

She was a fallen angel Corrupted by sin Trapped in the human condition A broken soul with a beating heart “She will never heal” I don’t believe them I refuse to drown in the grace of ignorance. I am covered with scars But I won’t be fooled like them Forever with the voices in my head Telling me it’s the right thing to do. Black tears of despair Dripping from my face And staining my once pure and white skin But I don’t believe them I know I’m still fine and She is the one She is damaged but I will try to fix her Holding her in my arms Feeling the heartbeat so close to my empty chest. Maybe this will help me as well. Maybe her passionate red eyes Will melt the coldness of mine. And then she could help me Learn how to breathe again Learn how to live again If I get to save her, I might find a way to save myself.

My nightmares I think they're coming to life Because everything that's happening In front of my eyes Is everything That terrifies me and makes me want to die It is cold inside my head I think I am being poisoned By the death thoughts inside my head Where I began to feel safe The shadows follow me And I know I am at the edge As my vision blurs again I cannot jump I cannot step back I am losing control It happens all the time I am afraid here Take me to darker places Before they come back to me I need to keep on breathing In and out I have who I have become Save me from myself Before I lose control again I am losing the fight once again I don't want to feel like that anymore Tell me I will be okay To wake up to live another day into this No, I don't wanna wake up anymore Take all of this away Bring me back to life I am tired and I need to rest To be able to face another day Take all of this away Please bring me back to life I don't...

Imprisoned on my mind Hiding behind fake smiles The anguish mocks me As I fall back into the dark I fall deeper and deeper As the sorrow smiles At my failures and thoughts I pray for serenity Anything to set me free To heal my cold body To make my heart beat again But there's nothing, nothing I fall deeper and deeper As sorrow welcomes me once again As I come back to its company A place I never really left I will never leave I am trapped into this vicious circle Doomed, the wind won't whisper for me anymore There is no music or colours here No reason to joy No reason to keep on trying Living Doomed, I cry when I wake up For the sleep in the only place I am really safe Set me free Kill me Set me free.

With knives I am hurting my back And with pens I am writing my sins My pillow blotched with blood I can’t sleep anymore ‘Cause I just close my eyes to face ghosts And open them to see empty spaces With this pen I shut it all off And with this knife I fight until I crash I run, leaving all my fears behind Screaming and shouting, my lungs are aching Against all odds, against burning bridges Climbing bare walls has never been so hard My hands are becoming so weak My legs are breaking And my hurt body is collapsing I wrote these shameful words where none else can see Don’t get sick, your ignorance is blessing The truth won’t set you free I have the weapons they fear But I will keep it all right here, with me All those secrets hidden behind my eyes You will never know who I am and what I have done With slaughtered words And an ink heart.

I know I am lost The silence falls upon me Like a heavy blanket But I am not scared I start to find this silence Comforting I am not ok I am lost But it is alright My heart sinks into my chest I am not ok anymore Though this is not the end This can't be the end Lay me down to rest In this bed I made for myself I cannot leave this bed May I stay here forever? I've made promises I was unable to keep Broken promises that stare at me I am a coward and I don't want to leave my bed My heart sinks My mind is gone I don't wanna leave my bed I am not ok anymore.

I walk these streets alone Wondering why the fireworks Are so distant yet so loud The sound hurts my ears I feel they bleeding as time passes Wishing the rain would fall again How I wished I would not care anymore It would make it easy To say goodbye and disappear Gone forever Fading into the night Like sulfur and charcoal Once bright, exploding in the sky Now gray dust Useless Worthless Gone into the vastness Of the sky The words bleed quietly Flowing, flowing And I wished it were my blood Flowing, flowing I walk these streets alone Enjoying  the dazzling magic of fireworks Wishing I was like them Wishing it were easy to disappear.

Don’t fear the night I’ll be holding your hands all the time And catching all your velvet tears We can face the dark together I’m here by your side, don’t you cry There is nothing left for us here They are already dead And we can go on Follow me through the night Stay by my side I will bring the light back to your eyes Don’t look back It will all be over tonight Sing with me Follow me through the night.