Quiet is Violent

Pretty little girl, why are you so sad? Please come closer, tell me where does it hurts so bad You are wearing this smile But your eyes show you are in pain Just come over, listen me for a little while I will make you feel right again Will you let me play with your delicate hair? What they have done to you isn’t fair Let me wipe away the tears running down your face And comfort you with a warm and gentle embrace They don’t understand you, I know it and I can tell The same thing has happened to me as well That endless struggle we have to face every day But if we fight together, we can make it all go away I will be there, ‘cause eventually you will fall But you will recover the strength and will tear down that wall I will support, help and love you – I am your friend At your best, at your worst – there by your side I will stand Take my hand, you won’t have to walk alone anymore The scars you have only make me love you more We will face, we will fight, we will overcome

I know I am lost The silence falls upon me Like a heavy blanket But I am not scared I start to find this silence Comforting I am not ok I am lost But it is alright My heart sinks into my chest I am not ok anymore Though this is not the end This can't be the end Lay me down to rest In this bed I made for myself I cannot leave this bed May I stay here forever? I've made promises I was unable to keep Broken promises that stare at me I am a coward and I don't want to leave my bed My heart sinks My mind is gone I don't wanna leave my bed I am not ok anymore.

I walk these streets alone Wondering why the fireworks Are so distant yet so loud The sound hurts my ears I feel they bleeding as time passes Wishing the rain would fall again How I wished I would not care anymore It would make it easy To say goodbye and disappear Gone forever Fading into the night Like sulfur and charcoal Once bright, exploding in the sky Now gray dust Useless Worthless Gone into the vastness Of the sky The words bleed quietly Flowing, flowing And I wished it were my blood Flowing, flowing I walk these streets alone Enjoying  the dazzling magic of fireworks Wishing I was like them Wishing it were easy to disappear.

I've been stuck on this place For two long weeks Unable to face the moon There is so much darkness here I write every hour that passes on the walls Staining the bricks with blood From my fingertips Soon this will be over I will not stay in this cage forever When the rain comes again My anger will be released A storm is coming Forget the illusion of safety None is safe There is no escape You’d better run for your life While you can But there is no escape Suffering is your reality And we're all going to die.

These voices Like knives on my head I am bounded to this pain With anchors Torn apart Every sharp-razor piece Bleeds I let myself get broken Because I am tired I gave up And soon you will too Once you enter the game You've already lost It's over Running in circles through fire There is no escape Let it go There is so much pain Let it go You will be proved wrong Start to beg Bury yourself Shameful hopeless Scream ‘till your lungs explode Do you really think you will make it out alive? I don't think so.

Oh, freezing moon Mesmerizing is its Power Glowing bright among the dark And when its energy melts Stars are born. Freezing moon So beautiful, Yet so lonely May this supreme force Blind the weak ones! May you not get caught With hunger May the urge for forever Not enslave you For the goddess above us Keep the brighter stars For the selfish ones.

He can’t be destroyed He isn’t real But he still holds My sleep Every sunrise I wake up among the trees Silence and gray haze surrounding me Golden leaves falling They can hear my cries Flashes of what I’ve been Come burning and crashing Echoing through my head Crimson fading images I can’t close my eyes I will drown in darkness again Lord of Dreams, please leave me alone I will never find peace With you by my side I will not have relief Lord of Thousand Dreams I don’t wanna sleep forever Into sadness and darkness every night Please just let me free I don’t wanna sleep forever.

This life This "golden future" Is nothing but ignorance I don't have a master You are not my leader I am not following you! I am starting a new foundation Out of this prison I am free There's nothing you will carry away You corrupted liar Their eyes shall be open I am cutting off the iron mask Revolution will begin! This monster will rise Under black flags marching, Heading to amazing glory Your power is fading away Listen to the screams of rebels No torment anymore Never regret We will tear it all apart We will take over it tonight We are not following you! Awaken the forsaken Revolution begins.

Then you close your eyes And there is darkness everywhere But believe me If you focus on it, You will see light ‘Cause there is always light There is always a candle with burning flame And we can make it shine forever! I will be the light that will guide you These empty eyes will glow again I won’t let the cold endless dark Take over you Raise your head Follow the path Let’s sing together Let’s make this heart Burn strong with passion again This is not the end Your story isn’t over yet You are not alone Lights will guide you home Come walk by my side If I stay really close to you, I will stay close to the heat of your heart This heart of yours That once was mine.

I used to be That beautiful shining light A big star In the dark of the night But now this fire is eating me up The stars... They are disappearing Refusing to glow for a tormented soul Oh powerful White Light Help me Take away this thought of pain Erase the dreams off my head I am trapped Once more I lost the will to change With broken wings I can't even try Help me clean this mess Fix my wings Light my eyes up Come save me before I burn Can you pick up the pieces That are still falling apart? Away from heaven I am nothing but A broken angel with weak wings and red eyes.

Darkness By your merciful shadow I bend on my knees Surrender and agree To be consumed by the flames I can't stand guilty Let me walk Please guide me To the powerfully blinding fire And I agree to burn in flames For all the sins I've made I agree to burn in flames For all the smiles I've faked I agree to burn in flames. Won't waste another night - No more thoughts! Walk with me up to the shore Until I touch the burning water This feeling is overwhelming Please allow me - Let me go I will sail away on the dead silent waters The waves will crash upon my heart And the tides will take me away Here I meet my fate Here I pay for my sins I agree to burn in flames.

I'd do anything To not feel this pain anymore My thoughts are so loud I can barely hear my mouth Feelings are overflowing Bury them for me! I can't define who I am anymore I need some help... Escape from this hell From this pit of misery and pain I know you've been suffering For a long time But this is not the end I can save you I am no evil Change blood for mud Be mine, and you will be fine Blood, blood, blood That's all I ask for I can provide you relief Shadows are security Isn't that what you asked for? I can save your life I will set you free Be mine Just say yes And you will be mine.

From the deepest of my mind Buried in dirty on my unconsciousness Once hidden, is coming back. Those memories, the bad dreams Crossing my eyes in flashing burning lights Rising, rising, Crimson-blood and sharp Growing stronger and cutting the edges. I thought they were gone I thought they were chained Caged on the bottom of my soul Lying sleepy and harmless in my core. But oh God, they are coming I feel the pressure once again My body will collapse, my brain will explode I don't want it to take over me again But it's a monster and I am fighting alone Screaming for help, I am powerless They only see what they want to see By the time they realize what was wrong It will be too late.

"Take another breath, it's all over Why can't you just accept It's all in your head?" It's all in my head... So can you please come over And open up this head Tear apart my brain And paint the walls in red In order to make these thoughts go away? 'Cause they won't leave me They won't leave me and I am being carried away On the outside I laugh But inside I am screaming The wounds might be healing But dear, I am still bleeding! Regrets come to haunt me at night Waves of desolation crashing around me Swallowing me, tides taking me away How long can I last? How many days still left? If I don't make it out alive If I don't make it through the night Maybe you will realize I was not ok And maybe you will remember I told you I was sick.

Hey, little child I just wanted to say That I am leaving tonight So good-bye! There is nothing you can do To make me breathe the way I did It’s all over and I am leaving tonight I smile, this is farewell Singing a soft song That soon you will sing too I am sorry for the storm All I wanted was a little rain To wash away the memories To take me away I fear no more Because I don’t belong in here, And I am leaving Born to fly high To run free I was born to fly high, To beat the speed of sound If I keep on flying faster And higher and higher I might be able to disappear Higher and higher Reaching the deep dark sky.

You accept the storm Even though it destroys What you have created You accept the seasons Even though you hate summer And winter is freezing You accept the blaze You watch as it licks and devours everything You accept the night With its darkness, monsters and fears You accept the ocean With its mystery and dark-blue deepness You accept to lay down and sleep Even though you wake up and realize your dreams are gone and reality smacks you in the face So why, in the name of God, Can't you accept my sadness, coldness and scary-deep thoughts? Why can't you love my messy soul and loneliness The same way you love and admire Other ways of disasters and destruction?

Hey Father! Do you still remember me? Do you remember when You told me nothing lasts forever? Remember when you taught me about strength and courage? Remember when you held my hand and promised I'd never be alone? You looked into my eyes and said You would always be with me. Well, I'm here to remind you of all those broken promises Because, well, I am alone now. I am all by myself and can't take this any longer When you left, when they laid you there Your bed seemed so comfortable... A place of relief for tired souls A place of no pain, no suffering. Father, would you mind if I joined you a little earlier? I will go for you and we will be together And you will mend the promises And I will forgive you for leaving Make room for me, I am going to get there soon Daddy, I will be with you and You will never leave me again.

I've tried for so much time To suppress these feelings This sense that is not human So blinded, so helpless I though this loneliness would disappear The emptiness would be filled Hate would turn into love. I was trying to hide the pain and the despair behind smiles and laughs You believed in me, But I am broken Always swallowing tears to look strong Bottling everything up in an endless pit My weakness has made it overflow It's overflowing... The hole was not deep enough And now I will drown On tears never cried On words never said On forgotten plans On smashed dreams There's no escape - I I can't run away All these things being hidden for so long Now unable to disappear and leave me alone It might be too late now I must be already dead now.

“Monster” That’s what I heard “… Monster” That’s what she whispered And these words got stuck On the back of my head For weeks I couldn’t understand That made no sense Damn, I couldn’t help her! And now it’s too late She’s gone, she left me and she tried to Make me see How could I left her like this? How did I allow her to be taken away without even making any efforts for her to stay? Now I am here alone, Buried and breathing in regret I now understand her words I now keep her last attempt, her scream for help It keeps yelling at me Reminding me how guilty I really am For the words she said I was unable to understand “Inside of me, there is this monster. Help me. Take away this monster.” The monster is now gone And so is she.

I need to get out of This body So weak, full of fears and emotion Sensitive body This is not a machine This is flesh, so weak... And there is this part called "heart" What is it good for? Meant to be broken Beating in despair Can hold so much pain, so much anger This is terrible! I need to get out of here I am trying to escape There must be an exit There is something crawling in my skin That seems to be cracking And this face looks so pale Like this body is about to faint They saw red lines around my neck Scars and cuts on my wrists They judged me, but cannot understand Cutting deeper, wide open, Is the only way out Is how I can escape to be free. I need to break free Human skin Is hard to live in.

There are feather everywhere There are feathers in all I see They are stuck in slow motion There are feather hovering over me. The things I have done – They haunt me all night long I keep telling myself I will be just fine But the voices inside my head don’t say so. They are there to remind me That the feathers won’t go away. Oh, my wish, my craving for flying Has it gone too far? Once white, they became as dark as a starless night The closer I get to a lonely soul The darker the feathers become. Are they facing the same fate as me? Will they be cursed too? They are murders just like me… No, I am not thinking straight They haven’t committed the same sin I am the sinner here – It’s all about me There was this bird I used to admire and love and… Oh Lord, what have I done? Have I really become...? I turned myself into it And now I face my fate Now I am the Dark Swan.

My dreams, my hopes My wishes, my power They are leaving me They are crumbling right In front of my eyes Falling like snow. I never though the sky Could look so deadly dark. Is this what dreams and wishes do? Do they make you blind? Because for a long time I could not see I swear I was giving the best of me But now I wake up and I am empty I breathe - cold air filling my lungs But that's all Feeling ill, sad, lost I scream as they all leave me behind Dear, my fortress is burning! Numb, I can't avoid the storm to come Nor move as I drown In the violent waves I am carried away Must I stop trying, so it will be easier when I'm gone? Or should I fight with all my strength Until there's no more blood And all that's left is nothing but A tired and faceless soul?